Islam's response to contemporary world problems (24)

The future generation

As for the future generation, The Holy Quran educates the society in a unique way. It teaches that in order to achieve the best relationship between you and your children, it is most essential that the relationship between you and your wives should also be excellent.

In that sense, the verse quoted above (Q. 4: Al Nisa: 35), which refers to the protectors (QAWWAMUN), places a great responsibility on the shoulders of the husband. If his behaviour is not conducive to the creation of an ideal environment for a healthy family life, he will have failed in his responsibility to act as a protector (QAWWAM). It should be remembered that the best example of QAWWAM was the Holy Prophet of Islam (pbuh) himself. He was neither harsh nor dictatorial nor - in any way - offensive in his relationship with his family. Keeping them on the straight path was a great responsibility, but the way he fulfilled this responsibility serves as an excellent living example, for all times to come, for those who wish to investigate and understand the real meaning of the epithet QAWWAM.

In a famous tradition, Abu Hurairah relates that the Holy Prophet (lpbD) said:

"The most perfect of the believers in matters of faith, is he whose behaviour is the best possible; and the best among you are those who behave in the best way with their wives." (Tirmidhi).

If parents truly wish their children to grow up as members of an upright society, they must remember that the mutual relationships between husbands and wives play a pivotal role in shaping or breaking the character of their children.

"Those who do not bear false witness, and when they pass by a vain thing, they pass by with dignity. Those who, when reminded of the Signs of their Lord, are not deaf and blind to them. And those who say: "Our Lord, grant us from our wives and children the comfort of our eyes, and make us a model for the virtuous". (Q. 25: Al Furqan: 73-75)

This prayer has a unique charm and is full of profound wisdom. Both partners in marriage are taught to pray for their partner and for their children, so that God will always grant happiness and true contentment to their partner and also to their children, and make their offspring the forerunners and leaders of a righteous and God-fearing generation.

We need only apply this teaching to ourselves to fully realise the meaning of the verse. When we wish for something vaguely, it need not influence our behaviour in any significant way, but when we pray for it in earnest, our behaviour is, of necessity, influenced by this prayer. As a further example, consider that there are many among us who desire to be truthful, and yet this desire is rarely translated into practice. Those who sincerely pray to God that He will cause them to be truthful are much more influenced in their conduct by their prayer than those who desire it for something more vague. A genuine effort is made to shape one's conduct in order to improve it. A person would act very strangely if, after offering this prayer, he treated his wife and children in a manner inconsistent with the prayer.

Addressing exclusively the younger generation, regarding their rights and obligations, The Holy Quran warns:

"O you believers! Fear Allah; and let every soul consider what it prepares for tomorrow. Fear Allah; for verily Allah knows well what you do." (Q. 59: Al-Hashr: 19)

The Quran warns parents that if they fail in exercising their responsibility towards their offspring, and leave behind them a generation that is blameworthy for their conduct, then it is the parents who will be held accountable before God.

Similarly, parents are warned not to "kill their own children" in the sense that they contribute to or are responsible, to some extent, for the destruction of their character (e.g. Q. 6: Al-An'am: 152).

Not only one's own children, but the entire young generation as a whole, are to be treated with love, kindness and respect, according to the firm advice offered by the Holy Prophet of Islam, peace and blessings of God be upon him:

"Always show kindness to your children." (Ibn Mayah: Book of Adab C. Birul Walad)

We cannot fail to note that this is exactly what the world needs today. There have been debates in Europe regarding the introduction of legislation that would make parents jointly and severally liable before the law for crimes committed by their children, and consequently be treated as criminals in the juvenile courts. There is a feeling that, had parents fulfilled their responsibility to discipline their children more seriously, crime on the streets of Britain would be greatly reduced. However, the question that arises is to what extent can punitive and restrictive measures improve the quality of life in a society when there is no religious ethical background operating in every sphere of life?

(lpbD) - God's peace and blessings be upon him.

(To be continued in installment 25).